Thursday, December 12, 2013

Home

Originally posted June 16, 2004

Now that I am back in the states, people ask me if I am sad to be back after such an incredible year. No, I’m not sad to be back because returning to the point from where you started gives you perspective. I am in a position now where I can take these experiences and run with them. I am looking forward to W&M life in the fall, as mundane as it may be. Then after this year another chapter in my life will be closed: undergraduate studies. My dad asked me this morning at 6:20am before he took me to work, what I might be thinking about doing after college. He has the right to be the first to ask the question, but NOT at 6:20am.

I guess I want what every person who spends a year abroad wants: to go back and travel as freely as before. I want to go to India, China, Kenya, Japan, New Zealand, Sweden, Nepal, Alaska, Russia and everywhere in between. I want to retire at 25 with a house in St. Malo on the beach, with another in Provence where I will paint and play piano until I get tired of it, then I will go and read in an olive tree grove with endless sunlight. Sure it’s slightly less than realistic, but a girl can dream can’t she?

I read back over previous journal entries and I wonder if I’m reading something that I actually lived. It seems very far away even though I’ve only been home for a short time. Both times I have returned from semesters, I have fallen so easily back into the regular pattern of life here that everything that happened over the past 8 months seems like a dream. But then I look at the pictures and remember the stories and I know it’s real.

I have been going over to old friend’s houses, trying new restaurants, putting my new navy blue room together, attending concerts, working a lot, and going out occasionally. Being 21 is nice now that I appreciate alcohol more. Clint has prom this Friday, I met his girlfriend (GASP!), and he graduates on the 16th. Someone else has been doing a little growing up, it seems. It’s hard to think of him going off to college, and my parents at home with no kids to look after.

He is yet another strong piece of evidence of the changes that take place in one’s absence. Home is never quite the same as I left it, every time I come back. Being here I have started to face some of the issues I left behind, and it’s hard. But I also see differences in how I’m handling them now and how they affect me. Maybe there’s hope for me yet. I think France taught me some incredible life lessons, and it was a milestone year in so many ways. So Mom and Dad, your girl has returned home a little older, a little wiser, with broader perspectives, and ready to face whatever comes her way.

Thanks for reading, everyone. To be able to share my experiences and reactions with you all and receive your own has been one of the most valuable and important components of this year. I have enjoyed writing about this journey so much I am almost bitter it's over. I don't feel like life here will supply much fodder for an interesting journal, but if something comes along and I'm inspired, perhaps I will update. Even if this is the last entry, I'd like to stay in touch with everyone, so please don't hesitate to write. I am pretty good about responding usually. So thanks again, I hope this finds you well, and I hope to hear from everyone soon.

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